1.38 a.m - Laughter, the best medicine
Hi earthlings! I know I shouldn't be awake at this hour.. especially for a 14 year-old like me. Anyway, my main reason is because I overslept this afternoon..wth I felt lightheaded..
the second reason, is because I'm all hyped up reading Reader's Digest. (2003 issues). I dug them out last Friday while cleaning and hey, they got some hilarious jokes! ..hahaha..wth I'm laughing like mad in the middle of the night!
As you can see, I changed my layout, again. For the hundredth time! Now I know I'm fickle-minded and things could change easily when I'm bored. So, better leave it that way, I'll not be fully satisfied anyway, since I get bored easily. OK, I promise to leave my layout this way till next year. I'm tired of changing it for good. :P
the second reason, is because I'm all hyped up reading Reader's Digest. (2003 issues). I dug them out last Friday while cleaning and hey, they got some hilarious jokes! ..hahaha..wth I'm laughing like mad in the middle of the night!
As you can see, I changed my layout, again. For the hundredth time! Now I know I'm fickle-minded and things could change easily when I'm bored. So, better leave it that way, I'll not be fully satisfied anyway, since I get bored easily. OK, I promise to leave my layout this way till next year. I'm tired of changing it for good. :P
ok, so instead of writing nonsense .. I got some lame jokes to share..
~~~During an interview, a reporter asked the bank president for the secret of his success.
"2 words"
" and what are they?"
"right decisions"
"how are right decisions made?"
"one word"
"what is that?"
"experience"
"how do you get experience?"
"2 words"
"what are they?"
"wrong decisions."
~~~"Hey, Peanut Butter!" The mouse exclaimed., and then climbed on top of the lid and started dancing. A second mouse saw him and asked, "what are you doing?"
The first mouse, still shaking his tail, pointed to the lid "it says, 'twist to open' "
~~~Mary walked into the kitchen and found Henry stalking around with a fly swatter. "Have you killed any yet?", she asked. "Yes," Henry answered. "Two males and a female."
"How do you know?" Mary asked.
"Well," said Henry, "two were on a beer can and one was on the telephone."
~~~An amateur photographer friend was invited to dinner and took along a few pictures. The hostess looked at his work and exclaimed, " These are very good. You must have an excellent camera" Later, as he was departing, he turned to the hostess and said, " That was a delicious meal. You must have some excellent pots."
~~~"I keep seeing spots before my eyes," said Joe. "I wonder if there's something wrong with me."
"Have you seen a doctor?" asked Will. "No," said Joe. "Just spots."
~~~"My husband is obsessed with his mother," a woman complained to a friend, "He visits her 3 times a day, rings her 5 times and even talks to her in his sleep."
"I think I know how to get him more interested in you," said the friend. "Buy some sexy black lingerie, black stockings and black gloves." The woman took this advice and stood at the bedroom doorway when her husband came home that night. He look at her and shrieked, " Why are you dressed in black? oh,no! My mother has died!"
~~~New arrivals in Heaven are comparing stories on how they died. First woman: "I froze to death."
Second woman: "I had a heart attack. I suspected my husband was cheating, so I came home early to catch him. I found that he was alone, but I was sure there was a woman there somewhere. I ran all over the house looking, from the attic to the basement, in every closet and under every bed. Finally I keeled over, dead."
First woman: "Too bad you didn't look in the freezer - we'd both still be alive."
~~~I thought I wanted a tattoo, so I had a friend come with me to the tattoo parlour. As I nervously paused outside the door, I noticed the 'T' had slipped off their sign. Now it read "Creative ouch."
~~~Why don't aliens eat clown? Because they taste funny.
~~~At the restaurant, a sign read 'Karaoke Tonight!'. Grandma studied it before asking, "What kinda fish is that?"
~~~I was in the restaurant yesterday when I suddenly realized I desperately needed to pass gas. The music was really, really loud, so I timed my gas with the best of the music. After a couple of songs, I started to feel better. I finished my coffee, and noticed that everyone was staring at me..
Then I suddenly remembered that I was listening to my iPod.
~~~Girl: What if a boy hugs me?
Mom: say Don't
Girl: What is he kisses me?
Mom: say Stop.
The next day when the girl goes to school her boyfriend hugs and kisses her well so she says as her mother told her to do and she quickly said DON'T STOP!!!!!.....
Well, that's pretty much what I've got.. LAME right? still, humor is infectious. Best of all, this free medicine is fun and easy! I laugh a lot.. even when it's not funny. No wonder my friends always ask me not to laugh so hard if they wanted to tell a joke.lol.
~~~During an interview, a reporter asked the bank president for the secret of his success.
"2 words"
" and what are they?"
"right decisions"
"how are right decisions made?"
"one word"
"what is that?"
"experience"
"how do you get experience?"
"2 words"
"what are they?"
"wrong decisions."
~~~"Hey, Peanut Butter!" The mouse exclaimed., and then climbed on top of the lid and started dancing. A second mouse saw him and asked, "what are you doing?"
The first mouse, still shaking his tail, pointed to the lid "it says, 'twist to open' "
~~~Mary walked into the kitchen and found Henry stalking around with a fly swatter. "Have you killed any yet?", she asked. "Yes," Henry answered. "Two males and a female."
"How do you know?" Mary asked.
"Well," said Henry, "two were on a beer can and one was on the telephone."
~~~An amateur photographer friend was invited to dinner and took along a few pictures. The hostess looked at his work and exclaimed, " These are very good. You must have an excellent camera" Later, as he was departing, he turned to the hostess and said, " That was a delicious meal. You must have some excellent pots."
~~~"I keep seeing spots before my eyes," said Joe. "I wonder if there's something wrong with me."
"Have you seen a doctor?" asked Will. "No," said Joe. "Just spots."
~~~"My husband is obsessed with his mother," a woman complained to a friend, "He visits her 3 times a day, rings her 5 times and even talks to her in his sleep."
"I think I know how to get him more interested in you," said the friend. "Buy some sexy black lingerie, black stockings and black gloves." The woman took this advice and stood at the bedroom doorway when her husband came home that night. He look at her and shrieked, " Why are you dressed in black? oh,no! My mother has died!"
~~~New arrivals in Heaven are comparing stories on how they died. First woman: "I froze to death."
Second woman: "I had a heart attack. I suspected my husband was cheating, so I came home early to catch him. I found that he was alone, but I was sure there was a woman there somewhere. I ran all over the house looking, from the attic to the basement, in every closet and under every bed. Finally I keeled over, dead."
First woman: "Too bad you didn't look in the freezer - we'd both still be alive."
~~~I thought I wanted a tattoo, so I had a friend come with me to the tattoo parlour. As I nervously paused outside the door, I noticed the 'T' had slipped off their sign. Now it read "Creative ouch."
~~~Why don't aliens eat clown? Because they taste funny.
~~~At the restaurant, a sign read 'Karaoke Tonight!'. Grandma studied it before asking, "What kinda fish is that?"
~~~I was in the restaurant yesterday when I suddenly realized I desperately needed to pass gas. The music was really, really loud, so I timed my gas with the best of the music. After a couple of songs, I started to feel better. I finished my coffee, and noticed that everyone was staring at me..
Then I suddenly remembered that I was listening to my iPod.
~~~Girl: What if a boy hugs me?
Mom: say Don't
Girl: What is he kisses me?
Mom: say Stop.
The next day when the girl goes to school her boyfriend hugs and kisses her well so she says as her mother told her to do and she quickly said DON'T STOP!!!!!.....
Well, that's pretty much what I've got.. LAME right? still, humor is infectious. Best of all, this free medicine is fun and easy! I laugh a lot.. even when it's not funny. No wonder my friends always ask me not to laugh so hard if they wanted to tell a joke.lol.
This post took me 30 minutes WTH
Goodbye earthlings! Sleep tight..GB
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